In The Year 3000…We Will Be Goblin-like?
By Justin Gardner | Related entries in ScienceOh my, this made me laugh:
The human race would peak in the year 3000, he said - before a decline due to dependence on technology.People would become choosier about their sexual partners, causing humanity to divide into sub-species, he added.
The descendants of the genetic upper class would be tall, slim, healthy, attractive, intelligent, and creative and a far cry from the “underclass” humans who would have evolved into dim-witted, ugly, squat goblin-like creatures.
Goblin-like? Goblin-like? Seriously?
I love how a news article references a fictional character for size comparison. And frankly, I always thought goblins were bigger…you know, like in The Lord of the Rings. Maybe we’ll become more like trolls. But trolls can get to be pretty big, yes? Oh jeezus…which fictional character is the most fitting?
Wait! What about dwarves? They’re pretty ugly, short and squat.
And honestly, the rest of the article is just as hilarious.
Read the whole thing.
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October 18th, 2006 at 9:46 pm
Technically, it claims the split will come around 102,000 AD.
It’s definitely out there, but you never know - throw in a nuclear holocaust or two, some global weather catastrophe… stranger things have happened (like lungs and opposable thumbs).
October 18th, 2006 at 10:30 pm
I believe the proper term is goblinesque.
October 18th, 2006 at 10:39 pm
The term will be Walmartian and the genetic split is already evident - 1000 years, no, 100 years, no, 10 years…now we’re talking. As evidence, I give you: Tanya Tucker.
http://www.tanyatuckerfansite.com/Fan_Photo_with_Cindi_and_Ruby.htm
October 19th, 2006 at 1:40 am
Yes, but don’t assume the Eloi will be in charge. Them Morlocks is bad-ass muh-fuhs.
October 19th, 2006 at 3:34 am
Actually I don’t think it’s as likely there will be a split, I just think the entire gene pool will devolve, mostly because the successful people are the ones who have zero or one kid, and the McDonalds assistant manager types have seven. On those odds, we’re gonna have a LOT of Mickey D’s around in a few hundred years.
October 19th, 2006 at 9:25 pm
Oh please, we’ll have genetically engineered ourselves into exinction long before the year 102K
January 23rd, 2007 at 8:42 am
I think the author’s a little hung up on Herbert Spencer’s works. Oh poop, I can’t wait… I’ve gotta know the outcome now. :)